Struggle Street

I'm struggling...

Struggling with the overwhelming negativity that seems to be all-pervasive, from the macro to the micro, from heaven to earth, from here to eternity.

I'm skimming the news everyday, can hardly bear to read full articles, can't stand the increasing nastiness of politics and daily discourse. I engage in a form of self-harm by reading the 'comments' on the SMH, or even worse, the Mercury, and am dismayed again by the shallow, the selfish, the vitriol, the arrogance, the narrow-freaking-mindedness of People.

God I hate people sometimes.

I'm wrestling with angels, or indeed something else strong enough to dislocate my shoulder, to weigh me down with the neverending internal arguments and monologues.

I find my comfort in familiar places - in the bath, soaking away the blah, in the kitchen, humming and focusing on the food (always the food!), in the garden, ripping out those weeds, tying back those tendrils, creating order, controlling my environment, any environment... seeing as I've got no chance of controlling that in my head, on focusing on positives around me...

And yet, tonight I've found a space for myself, of peace, of pate-on-rye, of *sigh*