Battle Scars

I'm discovering that the human body is capable of withstanding a great deal of emotional turmoil and torment... that keeping one's upper lip stiff and just getting on with it is somewhat easier that I had dreaded it would be... Unfortunately there's always an Achilles Heel, always a weak point, always a spot deep deep down where the armour just isn't quite strong enough to repel that sniper shot.

And so it is that I spent a good deal of last night in the arms of a friend, sobbing wretchedly as my heart was breaking...

I suspect it may have been a delayed reaction to this whole damn mess, as it was a response in magnificent disproportion to the incident which triggered it. Or maybe not. You see, I suddenly discovered yesterday, that while I have been playing this fun game of Co-Parenting with an honest and heart-felt desire to do the best by my children, I may have been playing blindfolded. Because I took the blindfold off to discover that lines have been drawn and sides picked and choices made, while I had been travelling along in my usual clueless state.

I'm just so damn hurt. And being vague. Again.

Because we're all being manipulated. Again.

And it sucks.


To be fair though, I guess over the last few months I've made a few choices of my own which have been surprising and yet strangely reminiscent of a Ewan McGregor monologue..... And I guess we're right back at the beginning, in silent contemplation of the enduring capacity of the human animal.