Delicious Snark #3
For those of you who haven't a clue (ie, everyone else bar W) Delicious is a monthly cooking magazine published by the ABC. Every month without fail the photo of their regular 'guest chef' Jill Dupliex, is am opportunity for snark not easily beaten...
Behold! May's issue!
It's like a check list of all that we love about Jill...
Large expanses of pearly white enamel... (Boy does she do her dentist proud...)? Tick!
Creepy 'Oh my goodness, what am I doing here...' expression? Tick!
Insatiable urge to grab random foodstuffs and clasp them close to her chest? Tick!
Ah Jill, last month I coveted the life you lead, in which you can swan about farmers' markets in a cocktail dress, squeezing tomatoes lasciviously... This month we see the unfortunate mirror image: the cowering behind the racking in a duffel coat, clutching the ill-gotten proceeds of your latest 'smash & grab' expedition to the local Italian Deli... This month I will bestow on you my pity... and this little tip... (seriously - go to Tesco - pasta is still surprisingly affordable, just starve Terry a little more and you'll be fine - please! leave this life of crime behind...)
Behold! May's issue!
It's like a check list of all that we love about Jill...
Large expanses of pearly white enamel... (Boy does she do her dentist proud...)? Tick!
Creepy 'Oh my goodness, what am I doing here...' expression? Tick!
Insatiable urge to grab random foodstuffs and clasp them close to her chest? Tick!
Ah Jill, last month I coveted the life you lead, in which you can swan about farmers' markets in a cocktail dress, squeezing tomatoes lasciviously... This month we see the unfortunate mirror image: the cowering behind the racking in a duffel coat, clutching the ill-gotten proceeds of your latest 'smash & grab' expedition to the local Italian Deli... This month I will bestow on you my pity... and this little tip... (seriously - go to Tesco - pasta is still surprisingly affordable, just starve Terry a little more and you'll be fine - please! leave this life of crime behind...)
Labels: delicious
posted by actonb at 9:26 am
4 Comments:
hahahaha!! Actonb, you have outdone yourself with this one. The pasta cluthced to her chest - just tres WTF.
Is it wrong that the very first thing I do when I buy the mag, is flick through to find Jill's photo??? Stuff the recipes! Give me snark!
I'm sure it is freudian: eat all that pasta, and she'll have a pot belly the same size.
mmmm.
Gotta love me some carbo bloat...
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